Change is a-comin

I remembered who I am today, and who I want to be, and mostly it was good. Great, in fact. I spent four hours at church. I joined the choir, so now I have to go to both services. I’ve never done that before, and I must say, the phrase “preachin’ to the choir” makes so much more sense now. But it was a decidedly good morning. I remembered why it is so important to me. I feel whole, or almost so, and I know I’m going to be ok.

This week is Rosh Hoshanah, and next week is Yom Kippur. Yom Kippur is the holiday that means the most to me, and probably the only holiday whose spiritual significance I take at all seriously. I observe it every year. Basically, Rosh Hoshanah is the Jewish new year, and Yom Kippur happens a week later. During that week, the book of life is open, and you’re supposed to apologize to everyone you’ve wronged and forgive everyone who has wronged you. Yom Kippur is the Day of Atonement. You fast, and then when it’s over the angel closes the book of life, and you should be ready to start the new year with a clean slate. Two years ago, I had my heart seriously broken by the woman I thought I was going to marry, and it was just a few weeks before Yom Kippur. I forgave her, though, over the phone behind a pizza joint next to Agnes just before I broke my fast. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, and it was the last time I ever spoke to her. This year, I have once again been pretty hurt just a few weeks before Yom Kippur. Come on people, work on your timing! So I’ll be spending the next week doing some soul searching, and finding it in me to forgive the people who hurt me. I know I can do it if I really want to, and I do. And it will be good.

Tomorrow at work, I’m moving up to Midtown Playground, which contains the crazy big high energy dogs. I’m ready! I’m also starting rehearsal tomorrow night with the Cantare Con Vivo chamber ensemble, which is awesome. Just trust me, ok? And someone’s coming to look at the apartment on Tuesday. I should probably clean up.

P.S. My kittens are NUTS. It’s kind of driving me up a wall. They play with EVERYTHING. I’m sort of new at this whole cat thing, so can anybody tell me how long this crazy rambunctious stage is gonna last?

~ by musiclikemercy on September 9, 2007.